I think back to our wedding day 12 years ago and think how little we knew. When you are young and in love you don't truly understand what it takes to have a happy marriage. We are selfish human beings, always looking out for "number one". You don't know how to argue effectively and love unconditionally. You don't know how to be a parent, how to balance your time so that you can be a loving spouse and a great parent at the same time.
We had to learn a lot and I am so proud of where we are today. In a world filled with divorce I am so proud that Tim and I not only are still together after 12 years but that our marriage is stronger now than it has ever been.
I realize there are certain things that have gotten us here. First and foremost our love for the Lord and putting him first in our marriage has been our glue. Having the faith to know He will provide for us during difficult times has always been our rock.
Here are some others:
Ever since our marriage Tim has made me laugh each and every day (often many many times per day) and I try and do my part to keep him smiling as well. We have (as you can tell from the photo above) taught that love of laughter and finding humor in life to our children. Having a family who is always laughing together makes you one strong happy family unit.
Having been married now for 12 years we know what one another needs and likes. Being unselfish in marriage is just picking up someones laundry when you know they have had a long day. It's picking up wine or drawing a bath for your wife when you know she's had a hard day at work. It's surprising your husband with something he has wanted for a while for no reason. It's arranging a date night spontaneously so you can spend some quality time together. Allowing your spouse to sleep in while you get up and take care of the kids. It's a constant give and take and predicing what the other one needs and meeting that need without being asked to do so and the important step here, is doing so WILLINGLY and out of LOVE for the other person, not because you want something in return or feel obligated to do so, just doing so out of LOVE
My husband is my best friend in the whole world. I can tell him anything and he knows that he can tell me anything. I love having a relationship in this world that I know I can depend on no matter what. I know he has my back and will always be there for me. Our friendship has developed over the years and has made our marriage stronger.
This was EASY when we first got married and didn't have kids, but it took me some time to understand the TRUE importance of this once the kids arrived. As a working mother I always felt guilty scheduling date nights since I never saw my kids during the week. Tim would sometimes book a hotel without telling me just to get me to go away. Now that the kids are older we enjoy frequent date nights and I just love that time alone. Even when we go on vacation to Disney each year we make sure we utlize the child care services to get away and have a night or two just "us". I had to come to the realization how important this time for us to connect is and what kind of parents would we be if our marriage isn't strong for our children? For our ten year anniversary we went away for an entire weekend and it was wonderful! I look forward to future adults only weekends we have planned, I just love getting away just the two of us.
Tim, Happy 12 year anniversary. Thank you for being the most amazing best friend, companion, father, and husband a girl could ever ask for. I am truly blessed to call you my husband. I look forward to many many more years and good times together in the years to come. I love you!!!